Satirical
The not so dynamic duo.
Jun 20th
Can you imagine if these guys met? I smell Sequel.
The image on the left you’ll most likely find either hilarious and/or disturbing. Nonetheless instead of describing this “real life Peter Pan” to you, you HAVE to check out his website.
One of my all time favorite villains, Anton Chigurh, from “No Country for Old Men” is a slightly similar looking, yet completely different person. If you haven’t seen the movie go see it, I’m still bothered by the ending. Definitely top ten movies though.
Oh… Happy Father’s day.
The streets of Clever City.
Mar 25th
I never understood what goes into the process of naming streets, or what goes through the minds of the people who name them. Meadow Creek Lane, Deer Valley Street, Washington Blvd., etc. A bit uncreative and bland. I know they have a few themed areas here and there, but here is a suggestion to street names based off how I would name a city.
The most popular street name is second street. The second most popular street name is third. The third most popular is first. Seems odds, but it makes sense.
Top 10: Fictional places to eat.
Mar 10th
10: The Max: I wish I had a place like this when I went to high school. I just had a place where I did copious amounts of drugs (not really). What ever happened to Max though?
9: Weinerlicious: Like Hooters, I’d come here for the food.
8: Soup Nazi Kitchen. Quite possibly the most quotable person from Seinfeld.
7: Honker Burger. Doug!
6: Uncle Moe’s Family Feedbag. Oh my freaking top ten list, deep fried to perfection.
5: Shenanigans. To be fair, this place seems a lot cooler to work at than eat. Especially since we all know what goes on in the kitchen…
4: Frozen Banana Stand. Simply put I love Arrested Development to put this thing anywhere else.
3: McDowell’s. Ironically, this place is actually a Wendy’s.
2: Raisins. It’s nice eating at a place where I’m cooler than all the other losers there.
1: Chockies. Joanna might hate that guy, but I hope that every time I come into a restaurant this guy is my server.
Holy Strawberries Batman! We’re in a jam!
Mar 4th
For those of you who have never seen, what is, quite possibly, the most hilarious, non-pornographic comic panel ever.
Thanks to this website, it gives you the opportunity to try to top the caliber of the original strip. Here are a few of my creations and a few of my favorite ones, I recreated in this format.
March Madness: 2010. Bond villains.
Mar 2nd
Well for March Madness I’ve decided to go with something new. I really don’t feel like writing about it, but here’s the skinny: I’ve replaced the college teams of a bracket with those of something completely irrelevant. In this case I’ve used Bond villains. Blofeld has risen amongst the cadre of your typical villain, and is now a generic stereotype amongst common villains. Wikipedia agrees.
Topical movie night: Babe: Pig in the City.
Apr 30th
Swine influenza, more commonly known as swine-fu… Just go to wikipedia. I’ve been sick lately and have met just about all the symptoms which I’m slightly worried about, although I had a couple flu shots a couple months ago, and they could be a series of unrelated incidents (i.e. allergies, bad diet, etc.). Nonetheless….
With all the news about Swine Flu (which mind you has very little to do with bacon) for your next movie night, a good choice is “Babe: Pig in the City”. Having only seen its predecessor, “Babe” I went to IMDB with the notion that this movie received fatuous, sarcastic reviews, like KaZaam. To my dismay, this movie received a lot of acclaim, with praise such as: brilliant action sequences, superior to the original yet different, thought provoking family film, and how its too dark for children and that children and adults will enjoy it on two different levels. So much positive review that I am actually taking the time to download both movies, even though it will be pretty hard to find a movie called “Babe” on the Internet. All I remember is that the pig is lactose intolerant.
Reviews from “Babe: Pig in the City” found at IMDB.
Internet larceny: Why DID the chicken cross the road?
Sep 18th
Here’s a funny little excerpt I stole from the internet. Little did I know these had a small following much like the lightbulb jokes.
- Pat Buchanan: To steal a job from a decent, hardworking American.
- Louis Farrakhan: The road, you will see, represents the black man. The chicken crossed the “black man” in order to trample him and keep him down.
- The Bible: And God came down from the heavens, and He said unto the chicken, “Thou shalt cross the road.” And the chicken crossed the road, and there was much rejoicing.
- Colonel Sanders: I missed one?
- L.A. Police Department: Give us five minutes with the chicken and we’ll find out.
- Richard M. Nixon: The chicken did not cross the road. I repeat, the chicken did not cross the road. I don’t know any chickens. I have never known any chickens.
- Dr. Seuss:
Did the chicken cross the road?
Did he cross it with a toad?
Yes! The chicken crossed the road, but why it crossed, I’ve not been told! - Ernest Hemingway: To die. In the rain.
- Martin Luther King, Jr: I envision a world where all chickens will be free to cross roads without having their motives called into question.
- Grandpa: In my day, we didn’t ask why the chicken crossed the road. Someone told us that the chicken crossed the road, and that was good enough for us.
- Aristotle: It is the nature of chickens to cross the road.
- Karl Marx: It was an historical inevitability.
- Saddam Hussein: It was an unprovoked act of rebellion and we were justified in dropping 50 tons of nerve gas on it.
- Ronald Reagan: What chicken? What road?
- Captain James T. Kirk: To boldly go where no chicken has gone before.
- Fox Mulder: You saw it cross the road with your own eyes. How many more chickens have to cross before you believe it?
- Machiavelli: The point is that the chicken crossed the road. Who cares why? The end of crossing the road justifies whatever motive there was.
- Freud: The fact that you are at all concerned that the chicken crossed the road reveals your underlying sexual insecurity.
- Bill Gates: I have just released Chicken Coop 08, which will not only cross roads, but will lay eggs, file your important documents, and balance your checkbook and Explorer is an inextricable part of the operating system.
- Einstein: Did the chicken really cross the road or did you cross the road and it now appears that it is the chicken who is on the other side? Or did the earth move about its axis so that positions are now inverse whereby both the chicken and the road have crossed each other?
- Bill Clinton: I did not cross the road with THAT chicken. However, I did ask Vernon Jordan to find the chicken a job in New York.
Loading ...